The Silence of My Voice

Amarillo todas las!!!!!!!! YES! I'm back like I promised. College was good. A bit fun, indeed. I guess I'll be fine after all, and I guess I'll be enjoying my time here. So the day started out with spotting old friends in the campus, making new ones, registering and verifying yourself. AND, thennnnnnnn! Our verification process completed till what, 11? And the next programme was the Puja Havan, which we probably skipped and were sitting in the cafe, because the havan created a natural sauna (this was Anjana's line on which I laughed my ass off).  The havan went on till 1:30pm, succeeding which was our an hour long lunch break. So checking the campus out was fun. We have like, 1, 2, 3, 4? Yeah, four places to eat. There's a phatichar sa Nescafe, CCD, Baker House and a canteen and mess. Which is like gooooooood!  This was followed by the Ice-Breaking Session, where we played this little game forming groups and enacting various scenes given to us in a hilarious m...

Amarillo todas las!!!!! What the is the cooking is the?  Alrighty then! Tomorrow is August 6, 2012. Monday! The day succeeding Sunday, and the day to meet the why-is-weekend-over frustrated faces. Okay, fine, I'm done. Tomorrow is my first day at college.  You know when you think of something and suddenly you predicate that your stomach suddenly turns ticklish? And your pulse rate increases, or is that an adrenaline rush? When you feel like running across a vast empty path shouting at the top of your voice? You got it?! Yes, yes, yes, yes. That's exactly what it is!  Obviously, like any other person I'm excited, and scared, and, nervous, and hyper. Tell me this is normal. Please, please, please? PLEASE? Okay, I'm just exaggerating now!  Wish me luck, fellas! I'll certainly, NO! Make that most probably. I'll most probably be back tomorrow to tell you about the ostentatious initial experience. Although my seniors and scaring the shit out of me that I ...

Much much much thanks to  Ajay  for yet again, awarding me. It's this Liebster award . Which, companeros, I'd no clue whatsoever as to what it meant. Open Google homepage -> Google Translate -> Type Liebster -> German detected -> Meaning Favourite. That's quite a booster, you know, considering the fact that so many people have been un-favouriting(that's not even a word) me!  So technically, you have to: 1) Tell 11 facts about yourself. Which you can read  here . 2) Answer the 11 questions tagger has asked, and frame 11 more for who you tag. Well,  (a) If you were given one wish, what would that be?       I'd like to start playing my guitar again. Or maybe just have the last year back. (b) Which place do you wish to visit the most?     Ladakh, I guess?   (c) If you somehow become the President, what would be the first thing that you'd do?       I'd put a bullet in Kasab's head....

Do you remember the time when you used to plunge yourself in the air and would be caught by someone? The time when whatever you did, hadn't contained the spike of fear? When you grovelled for something so bad, that it itself came back to you?  I've had none the above moments. I try to obliterate ticks, but my own very advent slaps me hard across the face, and towers over me hiding my being in its dark, ruthless shadow.  You know the times when there's an inner self so pungent that you take a leap of faith right up in the air, trying to touch that omnipresent light, and be lost in its glory? I'm that one soul who's so oblivious to her very own self, that she can't find that ray anywhere. Wherever I go, I face densities of unilluminated souls, I can't even make out the happy ones. I once saw that flickering neon ray. It was different from the rest. It glowed. It seemed familiar to me. It talked to me. It admired me. It never laughed on my misfortunes. It h...

Dear You, Well, yes. I'm pretty much reputed to NOT be able to express properly. Even my family is exasperated. Yeah, really! Things have changed. For better or worse, I'm not sure. But I could do with them, as long as you stay by my side. Actually, it's not even being beside you. I won't even mind you holding my hand and steering me forward with you. But listen. Listen. And understand that it has to be you. Puzzled? Have to be! I haven't been too cooperating either. But you need to see. I have my own desires and necessities and insecurities. Yeah, I know it sounds contrastingly funny. Me having insecurity issues. But I do. I just don't know how to show them. Maybe that's why I panic. Maybe that's why I need to be held close. This month isn't really as interesting as it had been last year. But then neither are the both of us any more. Things changed, I changed, you changed. But never for one moment did I allow myself to alter my heart for you. I d...

No, the title is just a song. Acceptance, although an easy word, is a pretty hard thing and an even prolonged process.  "Do this, do that."  "You'll never get it right." "Why do you have to do things that way?" "Is it always you do it like that?" Well I, for once, have heard these things to such an magnitude that even if a single soul comes up and tries ordaining me regarding re-doing or changing my custom to a fixation, he/she'll be revoking him/herself of a very precious organ.  The phrase "I like you the way you are" just doesn't drudge well for my little pink brains. There HAS to appear something or the other that a person must be opposing in the near future. Yes, I have certain preferences too. Doesn't mean I'll start imposing them without will. It's not like if I commit to the task, I'll suddenly have Ambani brains, a Jolie face or a Gwyneth Paltrow  ass? It's still going to be me!  Oh, ...

"So, class! This is Akanksha Sharma. She's a part of our school now. I'd like you all to help her be comfortable here. Introduce yourself, child" "Hello. I'm Akanksha. A nerd, for sure. I like to paint and dance. And I'd really like to get to know each one of you." "Alright. So, you can sit there. Wait, you should sit with someone who can help." "Oh God! No no no no. Not THAT girl. She's so weird! Even an elf might be taller than her.", my mind screeched I had been wrong! Ver wrong. And very naive, to judge someone. That just-a-little-above-five-feet girl grew to be one of THE most trusted and treasured part of me! Yes! That's she. Monika Singh Rattey a.k.a Chhote a.k.a Dhol a.k.a Complan Girl a.k.a Gay Designer a.k.a Queen Pixie a.k.a Blossom. We met her ten years ago, and what turned out to be a relationship of mutual dislike, soon transformed into a game of similarity and soon into a deep deep friendship! ...

Amarillo todas las!!!!!  Apparently a long break from writing, eh?  If you're thinking that I've suddenly turned my blog into a fashion one after reading the title, jump off a hill-top. And if you thought that this one's not much of a necessity, I'll throw you off one, okay? =P Considering femininity, there are obviously a lot of must-haves. That's a universal truth there. Again, jump off into a lake if you didn't know that. Alright! Enough of being a sadist!  Ladies, this is about guys in your life. Yes, I know I'm making them sound like a wardrobe necessity, but aren't they sometimes JUST that? (Okay, guys. Just kidding) Okay, so let's get down to business! 1) The Boy Toy From his naughty smile to his utterly deadly panache, you'll find everything about him perpetually insatiable. He's funny, sweet, cute, sexy; and is more manicured and beautiful than you're. Your atmospherics harmony with him is good for a holiday romance,...

Apart from the ultra-boring life that I’m currently leading since past couple of weeks, well companeros, I got into Sushant School of Art and Architecture. *dances her ass off* You know those heart wrenching movies like The Day After Tomorrow and Alien vs Predator or Bourne Ultimatum? Well as interesting they sound and look, and although I'd loved these movies to death, they ring multiple insanity bells in my head. The Day After Tomorrow. Day after I'll be in my den, sipping fresh watermelon crush and reading yet another novel (just by the way I finished One Night in Rio this afternoon). Even though directed with great effects, with an even greater crew, the film manages to make me poop some times. Even though the water level rose enough for half the Manhattan towers to be submerged, the public library somehow manages to have the water be held back only to the ground floor. Although the water force was considerable enough to not shatter the statue of l...

We at times predicate it's enough to tell people plainly we love them to make them feel assured, to say the least. I don't suppose it's at all erroneous when they say that you value one when they've left you. It's the void. That big black, empty cavity. There are times when you wish to plunge into the annulment and grab them back. Things start seeming all the more glossy when you try holding onto them. It's like a tug of war. the harder you pull, the harder is the possibility for you to fall on your back, and hurt yourself.  We grow adroit when it comes to shelling our back from reality. We pretty easily convince ourselves that everything we have will be lasting forever.  I lost my Nanaji today. I don't have a grandfather figure any more. The last thing I'm going to cherish is his proud voice a couple of weeks back, when he called me after my Board results were released. The time I spent with him, is untouchable.  All I felt today was regret, to...

Amarillo todas las....!!!!!!!!! So apparently, Joyous June, Day2 is here here here here!  No entrances plus joblessness is going to get the better of me, I guess! And today's inspiration is here... Subsurface secrets Lying hidden in our souls Stories left untold So companeros, my first attempt at a Haiku. Guide me, if you predicate I should surpass. See you around, companeros!  Tener cuidado. :*

Amarillo todas las....!!!!! So Kanika  changed Jaunty June to Joyous June (I think Jaunty sounded sexy =P) And today's inspirations is.... Accommodating  with yourself can seem quite a job, indeed! There always seem to be two parts of you - an entombed and an emancipated.  I'm seeking to exonerate, to this one rim of me. It's trapped. Pinned down to the mere mercy of my existence. Each fraction of me tortured to not live. My thoughts aren't my own, my heart isn't my own. They luxuriate my brain like an android. My own breath is no more a witness, for I'm pronounced comatose. Their conviction is contagious - for I feel hollow and futile. Everything passes through me like an X-ray through a bone.  I'm seeking to fly, with this one rim of me. It tells me it's okay. It says it's okay to have a heart ache. It tells me it's okay to dwindle. It's tells me to slow down if my ideas aren't working. It has allowed me to open up - to know...

Amarillo todas las...!! So apparently (I've been using the word a lot lately!) is my NATA entrance tomorrow! I'm assuming I'm prepared. Look what a bunch of free weeks do to you! For starters, I'd have never thought that that Math of middle school level would irritate the hell out of me. But then of course, you have aptitude too, which is a bit of a oxygen supplier. Although they expect you to be aware of certain architectural terms which you'll probably get to hear of only if you're a part of the freshman's year at any architectural school, like the water pipes in your house are superficially chrome-plated and not technically iron, for the water rots it out. BEAT THAT! Like they expect we go check the metal used in the plumbing. Talk of lack of imaginative field work. Tch tch. Such lack of imagination! And then comes the drawing paper - my knight with the shining armour. Only if I don't have to use the sickening colour pencils. The pastels are just so ...

Not quite the hola mood, companeros!  Tomorrow is superficially not going to be just any day! It's the 28th of May tomorrow!  IT'S THE FUCKING BOARD RESULT TOMORROW!!!!! *screams and hides inside the blanket* As like any other science student I'm praying for the worst to not happen, i.e., NOT BE ROYALLY SCREWED FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!! I'm enduringly freaking out. I tried the entire breath-in-breath-out thing, and you know what? WHOEVER ON EARTH SAID THAT IT CALMS YOU DOWN SHOULD BE RIPPED OFF HIS LUNGS!!!!!!  I'll have to probably acknowledge my parents' disappointed faces, if I happen to lose out on marks! But what's the entire point of compunction now?! I did what I had to, and what I didn't had to. This is not what you should be feeling, right? Neither AIEEE nor CBSE, there's nothing I performed whole-heartedly! I really wish I'd! =( Tener cuidado, companeros. And God save the ones falling under identical classification as me! =/

Amarillo todas las.....!!!!!!!!!!! Okay, so maybe I was able to put through the story of The Chronicles Of April Levesque  forward in a bit more convincing way. It had been a boiling night when she saw him. She was on her mission. Clad in a red evening gown, she crossed through the security undetected- as usual- toward the crowd. She was too beautiful to amputate your eyes from. She approached the bar and chose a goblet of white wine. It had always suited her fine- light, sweet and easy on her nerves. It wasn't long till Chenkov set his eyes on her. Being the reputed Don Juan, he tried flattering her with all he had. Contrary to her sensations, she played pretence. The last thing she wanted was to be identified. Knowing the satyr he was, she easily made her way to his suite. But then slipping in a pill was never the hardest of jobs she'd done. That was the basics when she was being trained. Drooling over her as if wasn't enough that he fell on the bed with a thump! E...