Stoner...11

-
I keep thinking constantly how sickening it is to be hanging in the middle of loving and forgetting someone. And by sickening, I don't mean morbid, but more like an illness. It starts affecting you bit by bit like cold, sores your throat, numbs your ears, and then gradually as the virus spreads, you take to bed. The situation is somewhat similar. You never know how, and when it'll get its hands on you eventually, and suck you dry. And all you're left with are unanswerable questions. I don't assume they're as unanswerable, as much questionable they can be. 

 WHen you suck a person dry, you'll never realise how much of them you've taken away from the person. Because not everyone is courageous enough to trust, and not everyone is brave enough to move over the pain. If you couldn't fuel their beliefs, do not give them further reason to not trust again. Do not make them as cold as you. Give them answers. Even if they're angelic enough to not question anything, reason out. Give them solid facts to believe. Give them the truth. You always owe a person who became a part of your life at least this much. Do not give them reasons to reckon that it's their fault, even if it isn't. You never know how much a person has to part with to keep you in their life. 

 We all always have stories nobody knows. Stories that hurt us, humiliate our feelings, break us apart. Stories that are the sole witness of our destruction. Everyone has a such story. Do not be a part of that story. We assume that our truths might hurt the person. True, they do. But it's the ultimate thing to help them out of you. If you really want to, that is. And if you don't wish to, tell them. If you're unsure, if you think you might go back, you tell them to fucking wait because you want to be there, just not yet. 

 And, no. You'll never be a part of that story for me. That story was long shut. You're just an incomplete secret story. My secret, my story. And that, I'm not going to let you take away from me. Because you'll always be my number one. 

 Turmoiled,
Ak.

Comments

  1. Raj5 September 2013 at 07:30

    if you don't place yourself at number one, who will?

    regarding the post, its strange how you can make a rant sound so so fictitious.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Akanksha5 September 2013 at 19:37

    Somebody.
    I'll take that as a compliment.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Raj5 September 2013 at 21:59

    it was meant as one. and akanksha, would you rather wait for someone forever than be your own vanguard?

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Say Hi, and leave your comments! (:

Popular posts from this blog

A Must Have!

-
Image
Amarillo todas las!!!!!  Apparently a long break from writing, eh?  If you're thinking that I've suddenly turned my blog into a fashion one after reading the title, jump off a hill-top. And if you thought that this one's not much of a necessity, I'll throw you off one, okay? =P Considering femininity, there are obviously a lot of must-haves. That's a universal truth there. Again, jump off into a lake if you didn't know that. Alright! Enough of being a sadist!  Ladies, this is about guys in your life. Yes, I know I'm making them sound like a wardrobe necessity, but aren't they sometimes JUST that? (Okay, guys. Just kidding) Okay, so let's get down to business! 1) The Boy Toy From his naughty smile to his utterly deadly panache, you'll find everything about him perpetually insatiable. He's funny, sweet, cute, sexy; and is more manicured and beautiful than you're. Your atmospherics harmony with him is good for a holiday romance,...
Read More

On The Verge Of It

-
Do you remember the time when you used to plunge yourself in the air and would be caught by someone? The time when whatever you did, hadn't contained the spike of fear? When you grovelled for something so bad, that it itself came back to you?  I've had none the above moments. I try to obliterate ticks, but my own very advent slaps me hard across the face, and towers over me hiding my being in its dark, ruthless shadow.  You know the times when there's an inner self so pungent that you take a leap of faith right up in the air, trying to touch that omnipresent light, and be lost in its glory? I'm that one soul who's so oblivious to her very own self, that she can't find that ray anywhere. Wherever I go, I face densities of unilluminated souls, I can't even make out the happy ones. I once saw that flickering neon ray. It was different from the rest. It glowed. It seemed familiar to me. It talked to me. It admired me. It never laughed on my misfortunes. It h...
Read More

"WAKE UP, YOU MORON!" Okay Then.

-
Design is screwing me through and through. With no clue whatsoever is going around in the world, keeping my head on my table, with metal on full throttle, I try completing my work. With your seniors and your mentor telling you that you don't EVER design a space in the first semester itself, I can tell you, companèros, it's pretty encouraging! With your jury on head, dangling like an ass-kicking-sharp sword, your professor asks you to change your design. What one approves, the other rejects. It's almost like an Armageddon between your own teachers. And to make things more exciting, you fall sick, and end up sleeping every night (NO! make that dawn!) over your own sheets with no FREAKING significant memory of it. So much for having anti-allergies to cure you quick enough! Anyhow, at least my other plan gets approved. YAY? Woopie much? You wish. It's time for me to drive, eat, work, yawn, listen to metal, work, yawn, eat, work, repeat! With drooping eyes, and aching ba...
Read More