BlogMas 2018 Day Two - The Empty Barstool

Hello.

More than a year ago, opportunely, I had the two loves of my life in the city at the same time.  And it's a whole new level of affair when you do it with people who see the same things as you, only in a thousand different ways than you. As I mentioned yesterday how most of us are running away from ourselves, some of us are insanely fortunate to have people who will never let us go alone at anything, no matter how hard we try to suppress everything. They're like sieves. They give back to you all that you pour, sans the redundant. And there'll always be days when you're most bitter with yourself - those are the ones when it's their word against the world; even though you're fully aware how nonchalantly they're lying straight through their teeth to put you at ease with yourself. That's what it boils down to. The adroitness with which they know which code to put in amongst the million incomprehensible floating words. 

Coming back to that night. Walking through Town, street after street, bar after bar. As we were leaving the last one for the night, I realised that for fifteen years, they'd never let me sit on a barstool alone. Any barstool. That night I was struck with the epiphany that out of all the relationships we build as an individual in our lives, the only selfless ones are where you're never sitting alone in that bar. 'Cause the most startling bit of it is that distance has never deterred them from filling in. And an even more stunning damn doodah is that I don't reckon I could have sustained a relationship with solely either one of them, without the other being there in equal capacities of steadiness and derangement. I meet a lot of people oftentimes. But I've never had a relationship with anyone that was created on my choices, where I understood what really it is to grow with someone,  and unquestionably be unable to think of having most first experiences alone, grow to respect them and their choices and support them - really just being a part of a life which doesn't precisely belong to either of you, it just is. So, listen. Check the barstool next to you.

Today's was my two childhood friends, Mon & Jag.

Until then.

Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.

A.