Sunday, 26 May 2013


Remains of the being,
Haunting each attempt to relive,
Battered wits, no trails left behind,
Walking this long now, 
The effort seems wasted, 
You seem wasted.

The superficiality of it all,
Excelling, taunting, 
Robbing you off you,
Bartering away, 
The very soul that was touched.

The stolen glances,
All a cliché to her numb mind,
The imperfections, evident,
It shone, he shone, 
Like gold against sand,
Looking of dew, and, 
Smelling of light.

She needed the bartered soul,
For it to be touched again,
Long had she forgotten,
Her deal with the devil, 
Yes, she wept, 
For there was nothing,
That could be warmed in her.

Holding her by the shoulders, 
He grasped the play of her vision,
He parted a part,
Of his being with her,
Walking on, as life gave way,
She had a part of him.

See you around, fellas.
Happy, for once,

Thursday, 23 May 2013

I Like To Move It, Move It!

Hola! Awesomeness be bestowed. Bleh. I've been making no sense in life, not that I'm superlatively vella. 
Ajay and Diwita, both awarded me with Liebster Award. Yay!
And I'm sorry for posting about it late, because well, you know, college is over, so I didn't assume a reason to check my mails. Ha! Selfish ass, you. Anyhoo! 


Such lovelies! :*
1. Thank the bloggers and link back. Done.
2. Okay, so since he didn't ask questions, I'm going to act lazy and act like there isn't anything to do.
But no, really. You're one of my most loyal followers, and you've really help me better. Thank you.

1. Thanked the blogger.
2. Diwita's questions. 

1. Because it seemed to be the right place to vent my feelings, whatsoever they maybe.
2. Batman and Ironman.
3. I tripped over on a staircase in front of an entire bunch of fourth years, with all my sheets piling on me.
4. Hahha. Okay. No dirty talks here. Swimming. Seriously.
5. YES! Three! I just got one done on May 17. =D
6. There are times when you're MIA. But I still go on to your blog to read old posts. It's like a peaceful haven. Just be around more often.

That's all for now, companèros!
I'll be back sooner. This is my 96th post. Just by the way! =D


Monday, 20 May 2013

The Chronicles of April Levesque...VII

You can read the previous parts here. Just scroll down for parts I-VI.

"April, we're still married, if that's what you need me to spell it out to you. And right now, we're to leave for my home. For the weekend, my father has organised a celebration in honour of my sister's marriage. It's about time you met my family."

She felt as if she would faint, "What?"

"It's been too long since you've been away from me, cero. Time has come to make the world meet my wife."


For the following morning Duardo instructed his bodyguard for their departure. Seeing colour drain from April's face, he kicked himself in the gut thinking this was the second time he was pushing her over an entire cliff of trouble. What was it about her that elevated her to an altogether different level, a level no women had reached up to he'd met all his life. She still sat there, at the corner of the bed, sinking, and she looked like the most fragile thing to him. The same fragile thing who had the power of good ten men, who'd knocked him down by a swift right hand, who'd droop to any level to get her work done. He smirked in mockery. He'd seen such women all his life. He had a radar for it. His eyes then drooped to her lips. The same tinted full lips. He'd bedded a lot of women in his life. But that one kiss with April years back. Something else. Nothing had ever come even an inch closer to it. The thought that she might have slept with so many men, kissed so many of them infuriated him. He mentally kicked his butt back to reality. Was he jealous? No. Duardo never did jealousy. 

April, in the past few minutes, lost the the ability of her rapid functioning. She felt her head had precipitated to smoke, and she was red hot with anger. How dare he enter her life again? How dare he do that to her again? She instantaneously charged toward him and grabbed his collar in one swift movement. Astonished, and impressed somewhere by her courage, Duardo abruptly held her by the waist, turned her around and pinned her against the wall with her one end still at his collar and the other locked behind her. 
"You definitely have some nerve I've never seen."
With this close, April felt powerless. "I'm a spy. What do you think I've been trained for? To raise kids?"
He chuckled at her mockery, "Well imagining you raising kids is not a bad picture. I'm sure you'd treat my kids nicely."
What? "What the hell do you mean, your kids? What are you turning me into now, nanny for your kids?"
Uh oh, this was a feisty one. "No. I lead a huge empire, April. I'll need an heir once I age. And let's admit it, I'm not getting any younger, and neither are you. And who to have a child better than my wife."
"EX-Wife.", she spelt it loud and clear, "So why don't you just adopt one? Spare me the hassle."
"Why not have the joy of becoming a father when I can?"
"Are you nuts? I'm never going to let you anywhere near me."

"Really, cero. From where I see, you're not doing a pretty good job at it."
She tried kicking him in the gut, but before this feisty trophy of Duardo could react, he closed in on her, and kissed her. He took her with a hunger of a man who'd gotten the taste of bliss for the first time in his life. And why not? Kisses were special. They conveyed too much - tenderness, passion. They're sensual and sublime. He softened his kiss but brought her closer. And what he could never have imagined, happened. April wounded her arms about his neck and was kissing him back. Duardo felt a heat spreading through him like never before. He grabbed her hastily, trying not to break the contact, and got themselves on the bed. Duardo broke the kiss to look at her. She had a stunned expression like that of a convicted criminal's. He'd still never seen eyes like hers. Their green tint still intrigued him as it had two years back. He thought that April would try resisting anything more and he'll have to stay up all night convincing her that there was something undeniable between them. ANd before she could potentially kill him and move over, he kissed her again. It surprised him that she let him. Gradually, he moved over to her long neck, which he enjoyed feasting on. A soft moan escaping April's throat fired him up. He removed her crop top over her head in one swift movement. April returned the gesture, only a little more expressive and his shirt's buttons flew to the ground. Duardo broke to look at her. Dios. Duardo silently cursed under his breath. She was more beautiful than he'd imagined. Duardo couldn't wait anymore, and in one abrupt movement he took her. April felt the sharp stab of pain, and shrieked. Duardo had felt an obstruction while taking her, but no. "This isn't possible. You were..."
"Duardo...", she heaved heavily in her breath.
"I hurt you, cero."
"Don't stop." He smiled and gently pushed her up. By the end of it, both of them breathed deeply in pleasure. 

"Why didn't you tell me you were a virgin, April?"
"How does that make any difference now? What do you mean by didn't tell you? I'm a spy. I'm not supposed to date, or marry. What the hell did you think?"
The guilt on his face said it all.
"I'm going to take a shower."
April sat there bereft, unable to understand what had hit her. She watched him go the bathroom and close the door on her face. She sat there, baffled, and embarrassed. She covered her stark nakedness with the sheet. She wept silently. She'd never been looked down upon in such a sleazy way in life ever. And the problem was that she'd let him. 

Duardo punched hard on the wall. He let the pricks of cold water punish him. She'd been a virgin, and he'd insulted her by thinking otherwise, in a rather gross manner. He'd seen tears welling up in her eyes when he couldn't present her an answer. He would have brought hell down had she cried. He couldn't even tolerate the thought of her crying, let alone by him. So escaping to the shower seemed the best option. He pat himself dry, thinking he owed her an apology. He would talk it out with her. 
"April, I wanted... April?" He found April on the floor. Stuck between sheets, crying, and downing more scotch from a bottle she already emptied half way down. The sight of her tore him apart. He'd brought her down to..this? He snatched away the bottle, gathered her up and took her to bed, still crying.

"April. I'm really sorry."
"Sorry? Ha! Everyone is always sorry. You're just another addition in the list of sorry people who made me miserable in life."
Duardo knew he had to take it easy, she was neck deep drunk. And as she continued to blabber whatever he understood as her past, she wept. Duardo encircled his arms around her and held her all night as she wept and slept through it. 
All Duardo knew now that he wasn't going to let his wife go back to that wretched life again. 

To be continued.

I'm sorry for being MIA.
Will be back sooner.

Sunday, 12 May 2013

मैं उसे जानता हूँ, फिर भी मैं उसे नहीं जानता.....

With the wind blowing through the feeble quip in the glass, she continued to flip through the primal sides of her grandmother's   diary. Every time she crossed it, it's whiff sent her about for a toss. Although manners had taught her to impart people their share of privacy considering she was a private person herself, she couldn't refrain from opening it. There was always a stillness that surrounded her each time she fondled it. Leathery, tattered, tanned, it's yellowed pages compelled her to consume each word into her soul like they meant something to her. Slowly unleashing each page of the diary, like unlocking a chest full of jewels filled Maya with excitement. Encountering each day of her grandmother's, she laughed because for Maya her grandmother was an enigma, who had all the time for adventures in her life. Until one page caught her attention. Emptying the contents of the page into her mind, Maya tried emptying them into her little sphere of belief too, but she failed. 


I can never thank Wazir enough for accepting my child. I owe my dignity to him. I will have to spend the rest of my life repaying mt debt and forgetting Ajay. 

It shook Maya. The ink of the last few words had been smeared, like someone had cried while writing this. She knew her grandmother, her Walda had cried. Something had happened. THIS had happened that turned Walda into the cold woman the world knew her to be. Meaning which, her Baba was never her Baba. She flipped further to find more, but there was nothing more. It told her that Walda gave up living somewhere then. She had to know the truth. She wanted  to know the truth. She instantly reached out for her phone.
"Maya, meri bacchi, kaisi hai tu?" The Pakistani touch to his voice always held a warmth. 
"Baba, I found Walda's diary. We need to talk, Baba."

To be continued...

Bugged, and bored,

Thursday, 9 May 2013

Bas Ho Gaya Yaar!

I don't know I'm bugged. Tomorrow will be the third exam in a row without any preparatory leave. I'm in no mood of studying. And most definitely not Surveying and Levelling. After an entire year of just working and not studying, I've perpetually forgotten how to study and write papers. I just want the next weekend to come running towards me so that I can be a free bird for once, and do whatever the hell I like. For TWO WHOLE FREAKING MONTHS. I'll sleep, eat, click, write, smoke, drink, repeat. 
Until then, I'll study, blog, talk, eat, study, laze, repeat. 

Craving Big Chill, 

Tuesday, 7 May 2013

Oh, C'mon!

Over-powering, superiority, loud outlook - it's all a part of hidden insecurities. I've seldom prided myself on being secure, per se. I'd be lying if I said I never feel insecure. But I sure pride myself on not hiding them by superiority complexes, for once. I'm not weak, contrary to what a lot of people believe. I've been made to feel all the time that I fuck relationships up. People even forget that I've been kindling relationships for as long as 15 years now. Disheartening, that not everyone can know everything about you. Not that I'm assuming for it to happen, I surely treasure my privacy. Only that perhaps people would stop judging for once. 

Human Settlements exam tomorrow. 
Still lots to go. 

Sleepy, and bored,

Sunday, 5 May 2013


You know the time you feel you're your only person, and your head can't be repeated and you're the only zombie that there is? I'm not a simple and easy person to deal with. People find awesomeness by some God's wish to be enticing. And what this awesomeness is supposed to be imitating I don't know. Probably magnetic. But one thing I've learnt is that the more people crib, and complicate themselves, the more people are drawn towards them.And trust me, I've seen some brilliant examples of it - live. I don't consider a lot among our race to be living with the same mindset as me. And even lesser than that who actually understand it. For someone like me who's amazingly friends with a lot of people, I'm astonishingly lonely and aloof and highly insecure. And this has N number of times affected my judgements, and clouded my vision. But somebody, with a mind equally weird, with an attitude equally cynic, and a heart equally turbulent, made me realize I wasn't the only shit-head alive. It, for once, seemed alright to let aside the work and talk, and probably let someone advice me, and not feel insecure for once as to what they might think of me. It seemed fine to drop the control freak mask for once and take case and talk sarcastic for once. It seemed fine with being helped out for once, rather than freaking out about taking charge of the situation myself. It was okay to feel appreciated for once. It was okay to laugh with a complete stranger for once. And it was okay to have been given your non-existent ego a boost for once. It seemed okay to know someone equally crazy to share love for the same kind of music that others think is shit.

He introduced me to this song. 

Structures exam tomorrow. Bugged. Superlatively. 
Irritated, and cranky,