Thursday, 31 May 2012

Where Have You Been...?????? =P

Amarillo todas las...!!
So apparently (I've been using the word a lot lately!) is my NATA entrance tomorrow! I'm assuming I'm prepared. Look what a bunch of free weeks do to you! For starters, I'd have never thought that that Math of middle school level would irritate the hell out of me. But then of course, you have aptitude too, which is a bit of a oxygen supplier. Although they expect you to be aware of certain architectural terms which you'll probably get to hear of only if you're a part of the freshman's year at any architectural school, like the water pipes in your house are superficially chrome-plated and not technically iron, for the water rots it out. BEAT THAT! Like they expect we go check the metal used in the plumbing. Talk of lack of imaginative field work. Tch tch. Such lack of imagination! And then comes the drawing paper - my knight with the shining armour. Only if I don't have to use the sickening colour pencils. The pastels are just so cute! 

Meanwhile, I'm planning to write a song for my chuddie-buddie Doodieman. Although it'll be my first, mostly feeble attempt at any sort of song writing or even the basest form of poetry, I'll try for his sake. There's something about rhymes - WE AREN'T MEANT TO GO HAND IN HAND. A kindergarten kid would rhyme things better, just that he's at a loss of my vocabulary. *evil laugh*
The Antarctica would turn into a desert if I ever get a verse to follow even the simplest A-B-A-B tessellation. 

Besides, there have been things happening lately which are enduringly pushing me into a cauldron full of thoughts. I feel like a blend of Rihannas in her songs "We Found Love" and "Where Have You Been". Haven't listened to the latter (Ignoring the unadulterated Illuminati influence and occults)? Go subscribe to Vevo. NOW! Coming back to myself, I've been quite a turmoil lately. I've never been this cranky, neither has the Bipolar fits kicked in so frequently ever since I was brought to fruition that I was Bipolar. :-/
But it's alright sometimes, isn't it? I'm trying not to be much of a mess. I wish to get back to my own resolved self. But then I feel excited sometimes, realizing that I can be this angry and expressive at times, and it's being enjoyed sometimes. Only sometimes you meet someone who pushes you to the brink of a world of utter nuisance and love and adoration and the kinds of insanity which never prevailed inside of you. 

Anyhoo! Kanika, the Queen Bee, is hosting Jaunty June(AGAIN!), and I'm going to make sure to be a regular part of it! 

So wish me luck for tomorrow, companeros! I'll see you guys tomorrow, most hopefully with Jaunty June! =D
Meanwhile, you can lend your ears to this song!

Till then, tener cuidado! :*

Sunday, 27 May 2012

So Apparently Tomorrow Will Be It.... =(

Not quite the hola mood, companeros! 
Tomorrow is superficially not going to be just any day! It's the 28th of May tomorrow! 
IT'S THE FUCKING BOARD RESULT TOMORROW!!!!! *screams and hides inside the blanket*

As like any other science student I'm praying for the worst to not happen, i.e., NOT BE ROYALLY SCREWED FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!! I'm enduringly freaking out. I tried the entire breath-in-breath-out thing, and you know what? WHOEVER ON EARTH SAID THAT IT CALMS YOU DOWN SHOULD BE RIPPED OFF HIS LUNGS!!!!!! 

I'll have to probably acknowledge my parents' disappointed faces, if I happen to lose out on marks! But what's the entire point of compunction now?! I did what I had to, and what I didn't had to. This is not what you should be feeling, right? Neither AIEEE nor CBSE, there's nothing I performed whole-heartedly! I really wish I'd! =(

Tener cuidado, companeros.
And God save the ones falling under identical classification as me! =/

Monday, 21 May 2012

The Chronicles of April Levesque...IV

Amarillo todas las.....!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, so maybe I was able to put through the story ofThe Chronicles Of April Levesque forward in a bit more convincing way.

It had been a boiling night when she saw him. She was on her mission. Clad in a red evening gown, she crossed through the security undetected- as usual- toward the crowd. She was too beautiful to amputate your eyes from. She approached the bar and chose a goblet of white wine. It had always suited her fine- light, sweet and easy on her nerves. It wasn't long till Chenkov set his eyes on her. Being the reputed Don Juan, he tried flattering her with all he had. Contrary to her sensations, she played pretence. The last thing she wanted was to be identified. Knowing the satyr he was, she easily made her way to his suite. But then slipping in a pill was never the hardest of jobs she'd done. That was the basics when she was being trained. Drooling over her as if wasn't enough that he fell on the bed with a thump! Extracting the chips and the disk, she walked away from the suite through the back door. Already dripping in sweat, she cornered herself to a wall,  and was viewing an easy escape. 
"Hey, what're you doing?"
Dumbstruck. She realised she'd never seen a man more beautiful than him. He had a certain air about him. Something she couldn't put her finger on. His dark gaze penetrated hers with a power yet unknown to her. It was soon she fathomed that he'd been asking something.
"Excuse me?"
So she had a voice beautiful enough to match her fragile exterior. He'd had his eyes on her since the moment her dignitary emerged from the security pass. The red suited the tone of her skin just fine. He couldn't stop appreciating the length of her tresses. In a world of Linkin Park and Emo women, she managed to stand out. They weren't really black, or red - some shade of brown he couldn't exactly point out. She had lush lips and he'd enjoyed seeing her sip her wine back in there. Her eyes were too big for her face; but it's ocean tint was something he wanted to dive in. He'd been disturbed when he saw Chenkov taking her to his suite. He was sure there was something fishy about her. A woman of her finesse didn't need the company of a man like Chenkov. She had wanted something, something more valuable than Chenkov was up for offering. Who was she?
"I asked, what're you doing out here? The party's inside, lady. Is everything fine?"
"Um, yeah. Yes, it is. Thank you for your concern. I was just leaving."
"From here? Quite adventurous of you indeed." The slightest of utterance of his voice was driving her crazy. She was only less than willing to realize what was happening.
"Yes. I should leave."
"With Chenkov's security onto you, I don't think so." She felt the colour from her face draining. He circled her tightly into the strength of his arms and bent his head to kiss her. He realised even after seeing her dollop two goblets of wine, she still tasted of strawberries and fresh peaches. He could see she was trembling. He liked the way she was clinging onto him. Either she'd been never kissed or she was wanting him in every possible way. 
She'd never experienced anything like that. She wondered what if he found out that he was the first man to ever kiss her? She shrugged herself away.
"Is everything fine, Duardo? Wasn't she with Chenkov?"
"No, Rez. She's with me. Is Chenkov alright?"
"No, he was found at a loss of his senses in his suite. We're looking for the girl he was with." She suddenly felt fresh sir.
"Thank you for saving me."
"You're welcome. I hope you return the favour."
She glared back stunned. She wished she could avoid comprehending what he was saying. His cologne was making her mind numb. 
"Favour? Wha.. What.. What favour?"
"You can of course oblige me with dinner?"
"I'm afraid that's not possible."
"Chenkov's men are still looking for you."
"Alright! Let's make it quick!"
"I've never done things in haste, Querido."
She wasn't liking the ring of his words. He took her to a pretty lavish place. A place when Chief had taken her on her twenty fifth birthday. Everyone seemed to know him. She could make out she was with an influential man. A highly influential man! She'd no appetite for food whatsoever. She saw him taking in every gulp of wine and food slowly. She couldn't take her eyes off his lips. They were mesmerising. She instantly put the thought away, ridiculing herself. 
She wasn't eating. He could make out why. He glared at her lips as she gently sipped the wine. She just had the perfect lips. She wasn't anorexic, for sure. She had built herself to be this sleek like a cat. 

They waited for his car to arrive. Once there, they stepped into it and rode off. 
"You can drop me off here. I'll find my way to my hotel."
"No. We're going to my hotel."
Her heart thumped under her chest. 
"Your.. our...your hotel?"
"Si. People know I don't let go off my female company till the next morning." She couldn't understand as to what sense is she to extract out of his statement. He took every inch of that beautiful puzzled face. 
"You sure drink coffee, miss..?"
"April. April Levesque. Yes, I do."
She felt her feet shaking as they got off the lift and were walking towards his suite. She felt she'd collapse. He ushered her into his sitting area. 
"Don't be so tense, Querido. I make good coffee."
She managed a smile. "I'm sure."
What a pretty little liar she's, he thought. He suddenly felt the urge to hold her and take in every pie of secret she was holing within her petite frame. He was surprised when she finally spoke and broke the ice.
"So what's you name?"
"Duardo Alvarez."
"You speak Spanish?"
"Si." And she smiled. He didn't know how, but he felt definitely finished with that smile. 
Duardo Alvarez, she recalled. So he is it! The billionaire playboy. Oh, where she'd been stuck of all places.
She ingested her coffee silently, as she'd been doing all night. 
"I think I should leave." She thought it was about time.
"What did I tell you, Querido? My companies don't leave until next morning."
She grew uncomfortable with that. He moved closer to her. She could feel his presence. She wanted to run away. Hormones, she envisaged. Get over it, you're a spy for god's sake, she screeched inside. 

He was really close now. With just a hand, he man-handled the remote and dimmed the lights. She could see every inch of his face clearly now. 
"Has anyone ever told you that you have eyes too big for your face?"
"I like the way you mumble."
He gathered all of her in once, and....

To be continued...

Sorry for the long break, companeros!
I hope to be back soon.
See you.
Tener cuidado. :*

Thursday, 10 May 2012

Just Today.....

Amarillo todas las.....!!!!!!!

Another part Ruhani's Mindblowing May

"It's positive, June.", those probably were the harshest word that ever dropped by my auricles.
"You mean, like really? Like 100% positive?", this couldn't have been happening to me!
"Yes, June. I re-ran all you tests thrice, just to be sure. I suggest you should retire for a while from your work. You need serious attention.", she simply spit the words out straight. She had a certain calm about her. My entire life hung on a rope now. How the hell could she be so calm?! She's my Godmother, for the love of God! Unwillingly, I broke into tears. Nothing. There was nothing that would comfort me any more.
"Oh, June. Honey, please don't break as of now! You should have let me know when you were having those symptoms much earlier. You're at a stage where you can't afford to stress yourself. Think of your parents, of Selina. She's still a child. She'll need you."
I wondered if she really knew the pain I was sensing. No, she couldn't. She's never loved anything more than her life!
"How much time do I have?"
"If you refuse to gather any medical attention, a year, or maybe even less. With treatment, you'll fight it for three or four years or so." Was it just me, or there was really an earthquake here?

"Joo, what did she say? You're going to be alrigh, Joo, aren't you?"
"Yes, Lina. I'll." How could I any explain to her that her hugs will apparently be the only thing keeping me strong.

"You! You're June Lenning! You're that dancer, right? I've seen every show of yours."
"Uh, yes. Thank you." After almost a year of the mishap, this was the last thing I was waiting to hear.
"Um, what happened? You vanished! Oh, dear! Are you being diagnosed for cancer?"
"Leukaemia. Yes."
"Oh, take care."
Obviously I'm taking care of myself, you dumb, my mind shouted. I had been losing temper more often than I ever did. I hadn't danced in exactly fifteen months and four days - and it had crept in inside of me bad, really bad. 

"I don't think I'll be able to do it, Professor. I haven't moved a limb in two years. How can you even think of it?"
"I'm here. Our old crew is still here. What's there to be scared of? I'm sure you'll hit it off."
"No, I won't hit it off, and neither do I wish to. You people don't get it, do you? Of course, you don't. Because you haven't been the one eating tablets like a meal, or the one screeching through the chemotherapies, or the one whose lost every inch fat and hair on their body. You'll never get it."
"We do get it, June! People have been in a worst case scenarios. If you loved ballet so much, why in hell do you refrain yourself from getting back on your toes? Or am I to just presume that you're enjoying pitying yourself? If not for yourself, do it for Selina, June. That child looks up to you." *and the door bangs*

"June, is that you? Holly, move the spotlight; Roy, clear the floor; Jay, go call Professor, tell her our dancer's back."
Two years, and I'd known what I'd missed. The auditorium looked different; they refurbished it. I was laughing, again. And dancing, again.
"And one and two and bend. Point them sharper! Round and round and stance."

"Doctor, she's sinking. Nurse, a GT7P. Now!"
"June. June! Keep your eyes open, honey. I'll save you."
"Joo. Joo. Don't go, Joo. You still have ballet to teach me."
And all I could know was that all they'd heard of me would be the monitor beeps. 

There I stood again,
Sans hair, sans my beauty,
The spotlight glared at me yet again,
The imprinting shadow, 
Stood behind me and captured my move,
And I was pirouetting away my fears.
As I heard them applaud,
I sensed what I'd been missing,
Maybe I won't be standing again at all,
Maybe the last of my body stretches,
Would be on a stretcher,
But I die satisfied, 
I will tell them,
I lived before the obscurity of death hit me,
And shattered my vision.
Maybe the only light I would see,
Might be dispersed,
But I would hold up my chin,
Hold my head high,
And show them that.............

I knew of a dancer who passed away, long back though. She was one hell of a dancer. Her moves would always make me shout hallelujah! 
Sim, this is for you. I'm sure you're watching, papayahead! 
Her absence has always been poisoning. 
I'll see you around, fellas!
Tener cuidado.

Monday, 7 May 2012

For You, A thousand Times Over..

"For You, A Thousand Times Over."

Present day LA
And the toaster puked out the toasts. It was an everyday religious routine for both of us. I grabbed the toasts and coffee and moved toward the dining table to be seated opposite him. He perforated the newspaper with his ogles. Oh, how beautiful they are! That had been the primary facet I'd paid any heed to. I could never forget the dangerously sweet glare of those golden eyes! 
"So, where did you tell me is exactly your tour?"
"Ah, Kentucky. It would take me a while to draw out a healthy plan for the refurbishment of that house. It's been rotten."
"Oh, you mean more than a week?"
"Naturally. I'll keep calling you. Don't you worry."
With that, he planted a kiss on my forehead, caught his drooling bag from the chair, and left. I sometimes only hypothesize we'd been spending more of "quality time", had he been sticking his butt more at home than in hotel rooms. I wonder if he still remembers our first meeting. Even after eleven years, I predicate I can't get over it. 

April 2000
I saw this new boy enter the campus. He seemed shy, or maybe more quiet and reserved. He was tall and lean. Covered up in white, I saw him promenade toward me with a huge grin.
"Hi, could you guide me towards the reception?"
A heavy, very heavy voice. His grin seemed genuine. His voice had a certainty and a softness. Something that had been missing in the usual class of guys. 
"Uh, excuse me? Where are you lost? The way to the reception?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah! Sorry. Straight through this door and the penultimate right. You'll be there."
"Thank you so much."
His innocent golden glaze had captured me. I couldn't define what had struck me, but something certainly had! 

"Oops! I'm extremely sorry!"
"Oh no no! It's alright! There's quite a library you've here."
"Bullshit! Pardon me. They don't even have a single Sheldon or a Jackie Collins or a Guinness. I don't know how they even call it a library."
He laughed on that. It seemed as if my entire world lightened up. 
"You certainly have some humour out there. Why don't you do something? Stroll along with me after school to my place? My Dad holds as many books of these writers as you can imagine."
"Really?! That's really thoughtful."
His house was pretty. Working parents. Single child. Multiple schools. And a room with an extravaganza. This guy was definitely different!
"Hey! Thanks for this books, dude! Tell Mr. Stevens he has an exceptional collection."
"You're welcome. Uh, I don't know how to say this. It seems a bit weird."
"What is? Go on! I'm a shameless creature myself."
"My parents are out for a week. Would you like a movie and lunch tomorrow at my place? I assure you I cook good."
"Ummm, okay!"
"See you at one, then."
"See you at one."
I couldn't possibly reason the sudden excitement. It wasn't like I'd never been out with a guy before.
He certainly knew hospitality well enough. He could give all the Chinese restaurants a run for their money. I failed to fathom his talent in food. He played 'Enter the Dragon'. Can you beat that? Either we're very alike or he figured me out about just right!
We were looking out from the ostentatious glass corresponded in his room. There was nothing I enjoyed seeing more than the playful raindrops on the crystal. I felt a warmth on my palm. A tickling sensation. He was playing with it. His extremities held a certain expertise I'd never experienced before. He glared at me. I glared back. I sat transfixed. Whatever it was, that filled the air between us, was electrifying. I'd never observed him so intently before. He had a beautiful olive skin. His eyes seemed golden when he smiled, and black when upset. His long, dark, tousled hair made his young face a seem more manly. His fingers paced up and down in my hair. And maybe that was it. Maybe that's why I preferred his silence over words.

July 2005
"Where're you?!!"
"Oww. Stop shouting! I'm at Olympia's."
"The Brown Cafe. Twenty minutes. Thirty tops." 
"But why?"
"Just come, will you?"
Getting a taxi in the busy streets of New York was the last thing I was counting on, but I still found one. 
Open the cafe door, and I stood transfixed again. He looked dangerously handsome in the grey suit. Tall, dark and handsome. I felt like I was living a dream right out of Mills&Boons. 
"What is it? Why did you call me in such haste?"
"Would you have Latte or Cappuccino?"
"Screw the coffee! What is it?"
"You've never had patience, have you?"
"Get talking or should I walk out?"
He handed over a letter to me. It seemed different. The paper quality was excellent. 

"You've been appointed as the Supervising Architect for John & Johnny."

"You've got to be kidding me!"
"Uh huh. It's real, honey!"
Maybe I was wrong when I stated on our graduation that he would never make me feel so proud of him again. 

December 2007
The forks and china cling as we had yet another dinner.
"I've to move to LA."
"LA? Why?"
"My works needs me there than here."
"Oh. Well, you can commute."
"Commuting 19 days out of 30 isn't really a good idea."
"I'm thinking of purchasing and apartment than lease one. Makes more sense, you know."
"Stop saying oh over and over."
"They have promoted me to be the Chief Architect."
"What're you planning to do? Embark on a route to make me feel the luckiest and proudest girlfriend ever?"
"Not girlfriend, fiancée."
I constantly blinked my eyes.
"Fiancée?" I stared at him wide-eyed.
"Yes. I'm not going without you. What do you think? I enjoy seeing you on my webcam? I'm not leaving you out here. And don't give me that look. I don't want you jumping onto me already."

September 2008
"Do you, Johnathan McCartney Stevens take Ella Courtney Moore to be you wedded wife, and do you Ella Courtney Moore take Johnathan McCartney Stevens to be lawfully wedded husband, and honour and respect each other in sickness and well being?
"I do." 
"I do. And I promise to cherish you till my last breath. For you, a thousand times over, I would live."

March 2010
"You know we're trying! Don't blame me for something I'm not responsible for."
"How aren't you responsible?! The report says that we're both sexually fit, and I've a good count."
"I know that. Stop speaking as if I'm handicapped of conceiving! It isn't my fault."

"Whatever that means!"
"Don't you turn your back on me Mr. Stevens!"
"What do you want me to do?"
"I never thought not having a kid would create differences between us."

Present day LA
Giving him a Can't-You-See-I'll-Miss-You-Terribly look, I mounted the car to pilot my way to the office. I witnessed a neatly wrapped box with an envelope. I knew it wouldn't be him. He never gave me surprises. I opened up the box to see a dazzling blue sapphire pendant. I opened up the envelope to find letters along with an information brochure. 
"I love you. Today was the day when I saw you for the first time at school. It's not just a kid. It's a part of us. For you, a thousand times over, I'd live."
She glanced at the information brochure. and the other letter reading a big red POSITIVE of her pregnancy report.
She smiled into nonentity and drew herself back home. Office could wait. Her attention was much more needed somewhere else.

This post is a part of Ruhani's Mindblowing May.
See you, companeros!
Tener cuidado. :*

Saturday, 5 May 2012

Don't Go As Of Now....

Amarillo todas las..!!!!!!!!

¿Qué está cocinando?
Yet another part of Ruhani's Mindblowing May. 

 Don't aloof me as of yet
I'm somewhere I elude the trajectory of epoch
I'm now as consistent as you were
When these enervated hands were pungently stalwart
Supposing it to be around thirty years outmoded
When I seized the first floret of the tree I planted
And spring turned out to be domineering to the rest
But listen, I need a hand to grasp 
The realization of still being alive
Is the last doze my physician couldn't offer
Don't go as of now,
Is it too much to ask for?

Your once soft palpable exterior 
Doesn't let my perished coat stand the fortune of divergence
Your playful eyes emoted much more
Than ever can my archaic sense 
My frailing voice would be the last thing
You'd wish to be attentive to
but wait, you've your mother's patience
How else do you conjure up your co-existence with me?
I'm living to see you bore your own shrub
It's the last hope my physician couldn't offer
Don't give up on me now
Is it too much to expect for?

These bespectacled perception 
Only kill time to discern the fruit my flower would turn into
Don't arch the boundaries of your distinction already
The sensitive streak of your mother
I ruminate is absorbed in the honour I taught
But it's alright
Till you let me still water my plants
A firm hand is the solution to my feeble attempts
I want you to carry me 
When I cross the verge to another lifetime
It's the last desire my physician couldn't offer
You won't abandon me, would you?
Or even is this too much to envisage upon?

That's all for now, companeros. I'll see you around.
Tener cuidado! :*

Thursday, 3 May 2012

It's The Way You Make Me Feel...

Amarillo todas las.....!!!!!!!
Another part of Ruhani's Mindblowing May.
This is an awesome awesome song. I wonder not having heard it any earlier!

I felt his strong hand on mine as I glared toward the obscure sky, glittering in proportions. His hold was piquant. I fondled the emergence of salty water on our hands, for it seemed like forever that he'd held my hand. My head twisted in his direction like he pushed a button on my hand which was meant for it. The golden gaze of his dark liquid eyes penetrated my soul and turned it to ashes. He was circling his thumb at the nerve of my wrist, and it drove me crazy. He planted little kisses on my palm which sent grotesque shivers through each cell of my body. I struggled to hide my condition. I sat stoned. I wondered if he could see the way my cheeks changed colour. He shifted closer to me. My heart thudded under my chest. He withdrew his hand and I could feel the coolness the air bestowed upon my hand because of the sweat. And he engulfed me in his warm embrace. I could sense his fast beating. It seemed to me that my heart'd explode and spill the blood of my love all over him.

It's been an year now. I see him making love to his Blackberry everyday. I was figuratively kicked out of his life, mind and heart. I tried showing it didn't matter but inside, I was screeching. He has girls around him more often now. It was that sole night on the beach when I saw him hold his fortitude out for me. He's lucky and you're magical together, they'd said. I'd disagreed stating I was more so. I now experience irascibility in his voice each time I call him. I hate the objectivity in his replies to my texts. He seemed to have forgotten about his promises to me. His standard expressions were now as clear to me as the back of my hand. Even a new question each time had old, irrelevant replies. I ruminated that his demeanour made me old. It made us archaic. He was unbecoming toward me. It was only as much I could try. A part of me believes that it was always something I'd done.

I rummaged through all my belongings which I'd happily allowed him to inherit a year and a half back. I plucked an album, our album from the carton of the memories he threw back at me like I was a dump trash for all his crap. Each time I see each of the picture, I think of all the times he screwed me over. They remind me of the low level he'd stooped to. He cut me off and made out like it never happened. I see now we made no sense ever. I'm glad it's over, for I don't need his love any more. 
You exist as just somebody that I used to know. But that night is afresh in the back of my mind, for I remember the way you made me feel.

So that'd be all companeros!
See you.
Till then tener cuidado. :*

Wednesday, 2 May 2012

The Acerbic Of Me.....

Amarillo companeros!
So following is a part of Ruhani's Mindblowing May.

"Oh dear! Whatever had happened to you?! When was this?"
"Ummm, this is before I married Doug. It happened while cooking."

I've been giving the standard riposte all my life. Initially I was offended a great deal. But now it was a sacrament for me. Slouching to everyone makes me overlook the truth. I live that day everyday in my dream. Every moment from that night is as vividly clear in my mind as crystal. When I hear him bellow and abuse her, it's like I can say it under my breath in perfect adroitness with his words. I shriek in my sleep at times as if my  sweet strawberry like waft and palate of my skin was again baked to tart and caustic. 

"Dintcha I tell you to not go to work, Cunt? You wantcha leave me, huh! Nobody leaves me, you whore!", his trouncing increasing with each invective which ever escaped his mouth.
"I can't just sit here and do nothing. My daughter ought to have a secure future. Why do you care?!", another hard blow to her palpable exterior. 
"Your daughter do this same thinga I make you do! I make her a star one day. I'll get her little fanny running! She'll do mucha better. I make her star on the internet. She be more famous than you."
"I'll never let you touch my daughter. Never! She'll not become what you turned me into under the veil of your false marriage proposal."
And another hard blow. I could perpetually hear her screech with terror. She called out, but there was nobody to pull her out of this mess. "You trya runnin'. I teacha lesson. I Carlo Bonnatti. Bonnatti. Nobody leave me!" And another and another. 
It was only so much a woman could endure. 
He ran into my room; I didn't like that look on his face one bit. I knew what was he going to do. He set the camera on the tripod in front of the bed. I couldn't call out for help, or my mother. I knew he'd bashed her bad enough for her to even try lifting her battered, bloody head. I secluded into a corner and pressed my knees hard into my chest. He tried pulling me out of the wardrobe. I retaliated with every fibre in my being. But his strong hands caught the better of me. He threw me on the bed like a dead body over the bridge. I punched, kicked, bit, screamed - no one came. I could only hear the anguish cries of my mother and feel every bone in her ankle crackle more than that bastard already had, in the wake of saving me. I saw him taking off his attire. He had a gun holster hoisted over his shoulder. 
"You playa now, or I rape Mommy dear."
"Get away from me!" "Uh uh. No escape Daddycool. You mucha more beauty than your mother."
"NO", I cried. I went blank with that smash on my face and could feel the red, salty liquid in my mouth. 
"You no listen. I go to Mommy dear."
"NO", and he pointed a gun right to my temple as I urged to go save my mother. He planted his hands another four times, with a power seeing which a horse would die of shame. He tore away her clothes yet again. That sly creature never let her wear anything inside the house. My mother screeched out of pain yet again. 
"You see. You see."
"I'll do gentle. You have no pain."
I retorted constantly. He threatened to burn my mother with the acid. I was rendered helpless. I unwillingly did everything he said. He took me with a groan I grew to fear more than anything in my life - and then I felt the stickiness of the blood as it cascaded my weak thighs, and eventually all over my bed. I was thrown on the verge of death because of the pills he stuffed into my battered mouth each day. But I held on - for my mother. After months of eating every bitter pie of the torment, I sloshed him to the ground one day. He ran towards the acid, and threw it towards my mother. I walled the path between the acid and my mother's face. 
The only thing succeeding it I remember is my skin vanishing into air as fumes and gun shots one after the other. One. Two. Three. 

My mother was let loose on account of self-defence.
The socialites only gave me their condolences. The entire nation empathised, but no one rose even a finger to pass on a cent for any surgeries. I did not mind that face; it kept people from recognising me as the girl from the longest porn film on the internet. I wanted to get past those memories. I was only fourteen when he took every integrity of my being away and sliced  it into fine pieces. And perhaps she thought, it was best to keep shut. This was until Doug came along, and I was reborn. 

"What happened? Where are you lost?"
"Uh, nothing! Just something I stuck up with."

Sorry companeros, but I've been reading/watching all such sorts of stories about women abuse. It's disheartening to see how these men manage to consider those little girls less than human; and this simply makes them even more despicable. They're ripped off their self-esteem and confidence and many of them isolate themselves to prostitution and take brothels to be their rehab. Recently I read about a handicapped girl whose own FATHER, without the knowledge of his wife, traded her for mere two thousand rupees, ad she was pushed into the cauldron of prostitution. On being helped out by a socialite, she refused to back to her village stating that she felt more at home in the brothel than she ever did with her own parents. I'm searching a suitable rehab or an orphanage which supports the cause; I urge you to do it too. That little girl out there is a part of yet another molested woman. 

See you companeros.
Tener cuidado.

Tuesday, 1 May 2012

And The Laughter Queen Climbs Yet Another Step..!!! =D


So apparently, a wee bit more time to my babyyyyyy's legality!
I'm just so so so so so so so dayaaaammmn bloody super excited for her! Tomorrow is oing to be a fun fun fun fun day. *does the dolly-dolly-dolly-dolly-dolly dance*

It's a big big big big big day tomorrow; well not just her, but a lot of people too! (Chit-Chat I hope you're reading this!)
A lot of irregular planning, procrastinated shopping- I hope it pays off. 

Isn't she simple pretty?

Yes! This IS her; Himani Gulati a.k.a Laughter Queen a.k.a Himanititis.

How can I ever, EVER explain how important you're? That you're the one incinerating the obscurity in my life with just that one smile of yours? That it makes my day to see you laugh? That when you come up with the conventional "Aur Kanchi, bata na bata na, kya hua?", you make me want to gossip even if I hate it with the darkest core heart?
Cuuuttttiiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!! :*

You're that one pinhole-sized source of light which is enough for me to smile all day long. And I'm writing in a purple font, because she loves this colour oh-so-much. 
Meeting her perpetually puts one under the knife of doubt that HOW, how does such level of optimism bound to exist! You can never fathom the beauty she beholds inside of her. Oh, this girl is filled with enough love for everyone to give Mother Teresa a run for her money! Her friends are her life, I know; and so she shows! 
The Bhartiya Naari picture!

Well, I'm still handicapped as far as investigating the fact surfaces that WHERE DOES ALL THE FUCKING FOOD GO???!!!!!??!!! Khaana hi nai band hota iska! Breakfast+Brunch+canteen+Lunch+Snacks+Supper+Late Dinner! 
You'll see the appetite of an extinct hippopotamus in the body of a size zero woman.
She's half my size, and eats quadrupole the amount I do 

God fearing, religious, just simply defines the best of her! Such dedication is rarely found. And it's not just God; she loves everyone as if they've been a part of her since forever.
But jo bhi bolo! Nautanki queen ka award to ise hi jata hai! 
Natak - 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5. =P

What she's unaware of is her meaning in my life. She swiftly came by like a breeze which takes away with it all my fears and insecurities. She's the reason I learnt to talk. The reason I laugh on senseless objects/happenings. The reason I feel things. The reason I might turn out to be optimistic at times. The reason I'm compelled to see the beauty within. The reason I know, that "Whatever your friends do, stick to them. You're the only ones who'll be setting them back on track!".

It's a random click, but I like it nonetheless, for she looks as beautiful as ever and natural!
Himani gulati! My words or my actions would never be able to define the love I have for you, and how happy I get with each of that warm hug of yours, and it makes my day to hear you say, "Kanchi, you make me so proud with everything you've won."
You, my baby, are THE most loved and cherished memory I'm yearning to be creating till my last breath, Honeybunch! 
You're the sugar sweetening the bitter coffee in my life. 
You'll never ever understand the place you hold in my life. Because within a matter of two months since the day I first met you, you brought to fruition my potential to love so much, cherish, desire, and respect someone as much I do to you.
It's five years since I've known you Himani, and even a phone call seems unnecessary for us to convey what we want to blurt out. Just a look says it all. You're that part of my life which never fades into darkness. You've stood by me through my happiest, toughest, saddest, most masochistic, melancholic phase; yet you've loved me with the best of your ability!

Honeybunch, your Kanche Ki Bottle loves you so bloody much to death, baby!

Pardon me for sharing the space for my baby, companeros! I'll see you around the block with hopefully either a part of my latest story (April Levesque) or with Ruhani's Mindblowing May!
See youuuuuuu, companeros!
Tener cuidado! :*